blog entry #27682 (i wish)

it’s twenty to eleven. i should be sleeping. but out of immense dedication, and partial insanity i am actually updating my blog. wowee. a horrendous incident just occurred involving my mother and broccoli, but i won’t bore you with all of that. as i speak there is a loud drunken debate going on downstairs. i don’t know what it’s about, i just hear random words creeping up the stairs, like ‘potatoes’ and ‘michael portillo’ and ‘intellectuality’. i have spent the last 3 minutes considering how these three could be related, but haven’t come to any realistic conclusions.
this morning i awoke at the ridiculous hour of 7am thanks to my fucking radio alarm clock. alarm clocks should be automatically programmed not to go off on weekends. argh. it’s so fucking painful waking up that early. but then Kaiser chiefs came on, so i got up. after eating weeatabix (wheatabix? wheetabix? weetabix? cannot spell it) i suddenly realised it was only 7.20 and i was fucking exhausted, so went back to bed. also that appalling song ‘califorrrrrniaaaa’ etc. came on, so i switched everything off and slept. actually i withdraw the last sentence as i have discovered that is the theme tune to the OC and i don’t want a hate attack of OC-promoting comments appearing on my blog, much as i have heard it is a tedious portrayal of overpriveledged Californians. oooh lovely, that should provoke plenty of OC-based conflict….
right. where was i? oh, yes, then i woke up ( for the second time), ate some more weatabix, and tried to tidy my room for a while. i say tried because to be honest i didn’t really get anywhere, and spent most of the time sticking pictures on my wall.
then i…. actually i didn’t do anything of interest all day, so i’ll stop there.
s’gonna be a busy week. three fucking concerts. ridiculous. also slave labour. and i have three essays to do. oh lovely. three concerts and three essays and three libertines. what the fuck’s going on?
all of my family are bastards. especially my mother who forced me to spend hours on menial household tasks this weekend. she even told off my dad for helping me fill the dishwasher. helping! clearly a fucking crime in our house! reid wonders how you can compare your mother to Hitler. i don’t. wonder, that is, not compare.
i am reading a disappointingly shit book about the royal family moving into a council flat. it is shit. i am also frustrated with radio advertising. and my family. and a whole lot of things at the moment, actually. hopefully next weekend will be better. there were just so many things i ought to have done, like… no you don’t want to know. forget it. if you really want to entertain yourself then stop reading this right here. bet you can’t. it’s just SO good isn’t it?! ha, i think not. but you will nevertheless read to the end. like a captivated otter. not sure where otters came from. like tarka the otter. but that wasn’t even remotely relevant. damn.

YOU KNOW I’VE TRIED SO HARD TO STOP MYSELF FROM FALLING
back into my bad old ways
AND IT CHARS MY HEART TO ALWAYS HEAR YOU CALLING
calling for the good old days

actually one good thing did happen this weekend. i sewed two red buttons onto my stripy cardigan! i am expecting everyone to compliment me on it tomorrow morning. actually no, i’m not, because my brother is on the internet, so i shall probably not post this until tomorrow. thank goodness for day one. two lessons.
i need sleep now. i only wish there weren’t the irritating sounds of a) my sister playing boxcar willie (don’t ask) on top volume b) the rest of the family still arguing about michael portillo downstairs c) the cat d) some drunken youths outside my house keeping me awake. (who gets drunk on a Sunday? is it just my family and the youths of forest gate who do this?)

oh well. i can handle this. *takes revolver out of back pocket*…
goodnight
x
PS just wordcounted this and was horrified to notice that i have just typed 600 words. jesus. i’ve been doing my French coursework for the last three weeks and haven’t written that much yet…
PPS i bet michael will comment on this entry and his comment will include one of the following words: fire, splerf, ben, spongebob, david bowie etc.